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TalkingCock.com is Singapore's premier satirical humour website. Access the website at www.talkingcock.com.

 
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Speak Up!
(TalkingCock.com)

02 September 2000
TalkingCock.com's K.K. Cheow reports from the new Speakers' Corner at Hong Lim Park.
In creating Speakers' Corner at Hong Lim Park, the government has proved that free speech is allowed in Singapore. Now the only thing they have to do is allow people to be able to hear it.

Hundreds of people thronged the park to listen to what registered speakers such as former Colombo Plan scholar Tan Kim Chuang, Singapore Democratic Party member S. Kunalen, and Think Centre members James Gomez and Yaw Shin Leong had to say.

While perhaps differing in the details, TalkingCock detected a consistent thread running through most of the speakers' messages.

Largely because of the prohibition on microphones, loudspeakers and other amplification equipment.

As Mr. Gomez was heard to tell the crowd gathered around him, "Fwahfwahfwahwahfwahfwah, mumblemumbleSingaporemumble."

Similarly, President of the Socratic Circle Daniel Chew could be heard commenting, "Gnargnargnargnargnargnargnargnargnar," a sentiment which was echoed by lawyer Kevin Tan, possibly with a few extra "fwahfwahfwahs" thrown in for good measure.

In another corner, the audience listened to Democratic Progressive Party President Tan Soo Phuanas he expressed himself thusly: "Watermeloncanteloupewatermeloncanteloupe, runningdogofamerica, watermeloncanteloupe.

Audibility notwithstanding, most people agree that today marked an important shift for the government.

"I think it's important that we allow freedom of speech, even if it's only in one place," said Miss Liak Bo Kiew, an undergrad. "And even if the speakers all sound like the adults in a Snoopy cartoon. You know, like, wahwahwahwahwah."

The people's sentiment was most neatly summed up by spectator Mr. Tiah Bo Leh who said, "It's good for the government to hear what people say on the ground."

At which point, Mr. Tiah's wife, who was with him, cupped her hand behind her ear and said, "Ha?"

To which we can only add: hear, hear!

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